"Many people ask why there is such a need for controllers to remain anonymous in toy control. Some don't agree with it, others do and some people just don't unde .."

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Should i remain anonymous controlling links?

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  • Feb 06, 2021 02:13:57 AM

Many people ask why there is such a need for controllers to remain anonymous in toy control. Some don't agree with it, others do and some people just don't understand the reason why, so this post is to open up a frank discussion regarding why you should or shouldn't remain anonymous when controlling links. Unless of course you are asked to reveal yourself with a wave or a DM when asked.

So please feel free to comment and share your point of view in the comments below or add to it if you think there is anything i have missed.

Building the fantasy

Some users come to this site and just want to enjoy a fantasy. Whether that be the thought of a tall dark handsome stranger taking them with their toy or something that they wouldn't normally do in their normal life. Part of the enjoyment they get from the vibes is that fantasy and revealing your self at the end of a link can cause all the hard work you did to get them to the edge or feeling great.

I don't want to play with you

Now we try to encourage no judgement but some people don't want to play with other people such as a straight person being controlled by the same sex or a gay person being controlled by the opposite sex. younger people might not want to be controlled by older people and vice versa so it is all about building that fantasy for the user (see above) and respecting their needs and desires.  

Try out different techniques

One of the benefits of you not having to say you are controlling means you can try out different things. Especially if you are lucky enough to keep on catching the same persons link and you did not get the emoji face or reaction from the person on the last link, you can try something different to get the reaction you want. To the point where they might invite you to private Message or join them in the app for a longer session. Where as if you reveal yourself early they might never invite you to their app even if you improve.

No hurt feelings

No matter how good you think you are, you might not be the best. I have seen first hand someone break anonymity and ask "how was it?" for the person they were controlling to turn around and destroy the controller with their words, So it is best to remain quiet and look for subtle feedback. If they did not end the link early then you were not the worst but if you did not get a emoji face or any feedback then maybe try something different next time.

Broken links

So you are unlucky enough to get a broken link and you leave it at one speed. Not the best for everyone all round but you do not need to tell them it is broken. If the user is unhappy with the control then they will end the link realise it was at one speed and restart the app and post a new one.  If they moan about how bad the controller is because of sticking at just one speed you know its not your fault and that no one knows who it was that grabbed the ink anyway.


Help us out with some player feedback

Now this is not all focus on the controllers as the link droppers can help out too, as most controllers are just looking for a little feedback and want to know if they are doing well. so an emoji here or there or a good job goes a long way to keeping the controllers happy and mixing things up a bit.


hopefully this will help new want to be controllers and maybe some older ones understand how to be a good controller and respect users wishes and want for anonymity, which includes staying out of their private messages.


As i said feel free to comment below and share your view. but just remember have fun and respect each other.


Regards Rectitude

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12 Reply    
GhettoBlaster© 🦄

Great post Rec. Maybe this one should be referred to in the post for new people.

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Mack🖤

This definitely should be linked to the new people info article

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Lovense20230418225500

Yes yes you should. So some back story to my required anonymity. I have trauma based cptsd with social anxiety. Controlling when you dont know allows me to build confidence and skill (and um Rectitude darling it took a month to get your face almost my sweet one lol)  

Nor do I wanna chat and answer how is it , better more less I dont want to video or voice I just want to explore. The idea of the above sends me into anxiety 

I use to never want to know and if you told and asked id not give praise for the fact you ignored a simple boundary I always state with my link. Here's my why starting 10 months ago when I joined. 


I have grown children and a firm limit to age no offense but if your near my sons age I see my 3 adult sons in my head and all their friends and I jist cant erase it. I also much like any lifestyle person should know of theirs know my hard limits , unattraction and NMK (not my kink) so if someone outside my boundary did take me i could never cause them bad feelings for their kink , life, fur what ever and would ruin the enjoyment it would again be something you can't undue. In fact 2 almost 3 did and I dont link now. 

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MikeyUKB

Very true and this should be linked to a opening comments for New users as mentioned before. but the flip of this is that if you get a bad controller (rarely happens from my experience) you MAY want to avoid, then knowing who it is, is an advantage - you could have Two Control panels 1. Anon  2. Known Pilots  - and monitor the traffic.

Peace and happy piloting 

Stay safe

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Casual

I think this is a great post and shows both sides of the equation and why they would like to remain anonymous, however, I really like the idea of splitting the chat into anonymous and known pilots, because it's clear a lot of people really want to make themselves known, especially new users and it might push some away when they are just getting started.  Personally I would use both channels just depending on my mood.

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CherryChaos

Well said Rex.  Miss seeing your lego hair and wicked gifs. Agree that newbies need to read. 

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DaLuv76

Great post!

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Thinger 8

Sure but would like to know if you and harley are finally togather and both you ok

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Honey Dripper

@Rectitude — newbie, and two yrs after your writing it’s still spot on *wink*. 


I’d like to say, again as I’m a newbie here, I came across an ‘anonymous’ pattern. I’d tried many… hoe humm. But then there was ‘this one’  


Simply, this pattern ahem …. Nailed it. And well… nailed me!! Sure I ❤️ and saved it… 

But for so many that didn’t offer what I was looking for, then to find this gem… leaves my mind searching in the shadows wondering if I’ll ever find ‘that’ anonymous creator again who so quickly fed my desires… 

I don’t need a relationship with the creator, to chat, etc… but I’d love more of that ‘creative content’. 


I’ll never know who that anonymous was… but I’ll remember that session for the rest of my days. ❤️‍🔥

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